Lonely Winter
by Nuke4Lyfe
Summary: Clementine is 18 now. After living in the apocalypase for quite a while, and being alone for quite a while, Clementine begins getting lonely. REALLY lonely. She misses the company of others and struggles for a long time trying to keep her sanity up... that is, until a certain someone who she thought had drowned appears with some light. T for swearing and possible inappropriate-ness
1. The Reunion

Clementine sat down, her feet hanging off the edge of the cliff. She sighed quietly. _No hope, no rest. I keep taking a beating, every day. _Clementine frowned at herself. _I'm starting to sound like how Kenny used to sound. _She thought quietly. Somehow her gaze went into the snowy field below. She shuddered remembering, and feeling, just like she had after she'd shot Lee, all those years ago.

"Lee, are you there? Do you hear me?" She asked outloud. She could almost picture him saying 'I'm here, sweetpea'. "What about you, Luke?" She questioned.

However, she couldn't picture his voice. She didn't know quite why, considering that she'd known Luke more recently than Lee. Maybe it was his accent. It was hard to imitate because of how well it suited him. She'd found herself getting 'Lost in thought, not the best habit now a days.' as Jane would say… about Luke. She really missed him, she missed Lee too, but… this was a new type of 'miss' for her that she didn't really understand that much. Maybe it was because she blamed herself for Lee's death and not Luke's. **His "Death", just like how I get straight "A's"... yeah, no. **She didn't blame herself for Luke's death, she blamed Bonnie. She remembered the whole scene quite vividly.

"_Clem! Listen, take out your gun, and shoot them damn walkers, okay? Just give me a little time."_

"_Clem, just go back for him! You're… light!" _

_I pull out my gun and start shooting at the walkers that are coming to feast on him and then-_

"_Keep 'em off us, Clem!" Dammit, Bonnie! What're you doing?! Bonnie reaches out her hand and he reaches out for hers and then- SPLASH! Luke was going, going, gone. I try to break the ice with my gun, seeing Luke bang on it._

"_There's nothing more that you can do!" Jane tries to persuade me to stop and then- CRASH! I'm in the water too. I flip out until I'm facing one of the worst things I've had to go through. Luke's drowned body, floating in the water. I think things over before actions and try to reach out when- SPLASH! I'm above the surface again._

"_Dammit! She's gonna fucking freeze to death!" Jane says and begins carrying me away from the ice. The only, and worst thing I think... "I'd come back for you."…"Thank you, Clem. I'd do the same." _

Clementine feels tears rim around her eyes but forcefully blinks them back. _I'm not crying about this. I WON'T cry about this. Dammit! _She feels a tear roll down her cheek and wipes it away quickly.

"No, Clem. You have to be strong." She reminds herself and stands up. Her foot quickly slips though and thud! It's the bridge scene all over again.

_SHIT! _Her head hits the ground but by instinct, her hands grab the edge of the cliff, she's now dangling from the cliff, a five-hundred foot drop below her.

**Clementine's POV:**

My heart is racing and my arms are getting tired. _Don't let go, Clem. DON'T LET GO! Luke and Lee, and the others would want you to survive! _I feel my hand slip a little from the snowy covered grass, DAMN ICE! YOU'VE NEVER LIKED ME! _This is it. This is how I die, in a shitty way just like Sarah, and Nick. Chuck, Ben, Christa… _And as if Lee is there, and is a guardian angel that's protecting me… I feel a strong arm grab my hand and pull me up.

"Oof!" My head is throbbing as I land with a thud back on the top of the cliff. All I can see is a pair of shoes, and the snow and ice that's burning from coldness against my chin. The same snow and ice that almost got me killed.

"Y- You okay?" a voice asks _Am I actually hearing this? _I wonder as an all too familiar voice fills in around me. It's panting, but I can still tell who… or who I THINK it is.

"Y- yeah… Luke?" I ask as I sit up. The guy, a very specific guy I might add, finally looks up at me.

"Huh? How do you-" Luke seems almost as excited, like screaming-inside excited as I am.

"C- Clementine?" He asked, he is jaw dropped! This should be fun.

"How did you… where did you… WHAT?!" I'm so confused I think my mind is playing tricks on me.

"I- I don't… hold up! You're the same Clementine I think you are, like 'Pull out your gun, and shoot them damn walkers!' Clementine, right?" Luke asked.

"I- I think, yes… and you're the same 'I just totally drowned' Luke?" I ask

"I, d- didn't drown but… yeah… I-" I cut him off as I force a hug on him. My arms are wrapped around his neck as I bury my head into his shoulder.

"Clem?" He asks and places his hands on my back, finally accepting the hug.

"Do you know how long I've worried about you, you asshole?!" I ask angrily. I'm not actually angry though, I'm fighting back even more tears.

**3****rd**** POV: **

"You? Stitch up your own arm, Clementine, were worried? About lil' ol' me?" Luke joked.

Clementine stayed silent, but nodded her head yes as she dug her head deeper into his shoulder and dug her nails into his back.

"Ah! Shit!"

"What?" Clementine asked, her voice was muffled. Luke winced slightly.

"Nothing… just… you've got a really strong grip." Luke said and clenched his teeth.

"Sorry I just, I really missed you." Clementine said while she loosened her grip.

Luke felt a warm fuzzy feeling fill inside him. "You missed me?" He asks quietly.

"Yes! Do you know how many nightmares I've had about you?!" Clementine replies while breaking away from him.

"You had… nightmares? About me drowning?" Luke frowned. Had he really worried her that much?

"YES! Do you know how traumatizing it is to see your crush drown in front of you? 'Cause it's really fucking scary!" The words are out of her mouth before she can stop them. An evil grin etches its way across Luke's lips.

"You had a crush on me?" He grinned.

Clementine blushed and face palmed. "When I was eleven, yes. I did." She sighed.

"Aww, that's cute." He teased.

"Oh, shut up." Clementine frowned and punched him on the arm. "You had a crush on Jane! Only difference is you DID stuff about it." Clementine grinned back making Luke blush slightly.

"I- no I-"

"Cat got your tongue?" Clementine smirked.

"No, it's just- anyways." Luke huffed. "What're you doin' out here all alone, and stuff?" He questioned. "'Cause it looked to me like you almost died just now… ya know, alone and stuff."

"Yeah, but then you came, and you made it all better, like you always do." Luke smiled sheepishly at the last part. 'Like you always do'… did she really think that?

"You never answered my question, though." Luke pointed out. "Why're you alone?"

"Jane, Kenny, Mike, Bonnie- they all literally went a bit crazy after you 'died'… I had to put them down… all of them, well, not Bonnie and Mike, they tried to leave in the middle of the night and I got shot because of it. Then I was with Jane and Kenny, Jane hid AJ saying he died, Kenny went crazy and tried to kill Jane… I shot Kenny, Jane confessed… I left Jane." Clementine explained, her expression was emotionless.

"Damn. Sounds like it hasn't been an easy life, kid." He sighed. "And… AJ?" Luke questioned softly.

"I left him at Wellington… he's safe now." She answered proudly.

Luke smiled slightly. "You're a good-"

"Don't you DARE call me a kid again, Luke!" Clementine said. Luke smirked.

"kid." He smiled.

"Why you little!" Clementine tackled Luke to the ground.

"Hey! Hey! Stop!" Luke laughed while trying to keep her off of him.

Clementine didn't listen as she began tickling him.

"HAH! STOP!" Luke laughed, "S- stop, Clem! I-"

"Luke?" A voice questioned behind them. Clementine stopped quickly as she looked up to see a girl she was quite certain she'd never seen before.

Luke looked in the direction he called up, but the direction Clementine called forward. **Luke was laying on the ground, Clementine was basically sitting on top of him so, they have different directions as up, down, left, and right.**

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><p><strong>AN: Sorry if this chapter was kind of a disappointment, I'm a bit rusty with my writing as you can probably tell. So uh, I decided to post one chapter of this today, tomorrow I'm either going to post another chapter of this, if you guys/girls like it so far, or a chapter of 'Girl of Eye'. I haven't gotten around to writing a first chapter to the story called 'Illusion in the Memory' (To those of you who have no clue what I'm talking about, I took a survey on this earlier, and 'Girl of Eye' is a highschool AU featuring Cluke, and 'Illusion in the Memory' is a story where Season two really IS just a dream, Clementine gets to change the events that take place in both seasons, etc.****) ALSO! Bold words, which, I admit, I probably should've said this before the story started, are my own personal thoughts about... whatever I just wrote. Yeah. OH! And, if you're going to leave a review anyways, should this story be a 'Clementine and Luke are such good friends' (brOTP sort of thing) or a 'Oh my gosh, later in the story Clementine and Luke are totally gonna be gf and bf' sort of thing? I really need help with this part.**


	2. Who is SHE?

**A/N: Er... o.e so... so far, Girl of Eye AND Lonely Winter are kind of tied on reviews... review numbers are kind of how I was planning on deciding which fic I should continue first, finish, and then start the next one. A lot of people still want Illusion in the Memory... I'm very conflicted between four stories, because I still have that major urge to write a story where Clementine is eleven and is crushing on a 26 year old Nick (Nick does NOT like Clementine like that, in case you were wondering). So I need a bit of help... I don't know, anyways... here's chapter two! OH! And also! I've decided to turn this into some sort of awkward panda (Basically, just really awkward) crushing story where Clem likes Luke and then eventually they totally get together because it seems to be what most people want... I'm not certain on my decision but I think I can get some pretty cute chapters out with that.**

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><p><strong>Clementine's POV:<strong>

"Luke, what're you doing? Who is SHE?" The woman asked and furrowed her brows as she pointed at me.

"Oh, uhm, J- Julie... this is Cl- Clementine... she uh, I've known her since she was eleven and-"

"And I've known you since I was born, what does it matter? Come on, Ellie's beginning to worry about you." The girl who I knew to be 'Julie' said crossly.

"Hey, uh, can Clementine come?" Luke asked and propped himself up on his elbows.

"Well I'd like her to really, as long as she gets off of you." Julie scowled. I quickly got on my feet and off of on top of Luke.

"Okay, looks like your girlfriend can tag along." Julie said way too sweetly, sarcasm was coming off of her in waves.

Luke sighed and got to his feet, dusting off his pants before we began down the mountain.

"What's her problem?" I whispered quietly.

"She's a little pissed right now... as you can tell, and uh, she kind of has a crush on me so... seeing a girl sitting on top of me might make her feel a little intimidated." He explained.

"Ah," I nodded and smirked as I elbowed Luke in the ribs. "Casanova." I said remembering Mike's comment by the fire.

Luke gave me a disapproving look before turning his head to look back to where we were walking. I don't know why... but seeing Luke now made me feel... weird... like how I felt when I was eleven almost.

I took another glance at Luke. His hair, or... bangs (fringe) fell over his eyes almost, and there was a visible silver streak running through the middle of them as they swayed to one side.

"Luke?" I asked gingerly.

He turned and looked at me. "Yeah, Clem?" He asked with a forced smile. I frowned but continued.

"How old are you?" I asked.

Luke frowned too. "How old do I look?" He questioned.

"I dunno, you've got a silver streak through your hair which you make look totally ho-" I cut myself off and mentally slapped myself.

I watched as Luke's lips quirked into another evil grin. "What?" He asked angelically.

_I was NOT going to say he made it look hot! I was NOT!_ "You look like you're thirty something." I sighed before moving on from mentally slapping myself, to mentally beating the shit out of myself.

Luke returned his gaze to in front of him. "Thirty what?" He questioned.

I thought hard as I squinted in front of myself. He was twenty-seven when he 'Died', I re-met him when I was eighteen, I was eleven when he- THIRTY-FOUR! He's thirty-four!

"You LOOK like you're thirty-two, but you ARE thirty-four." I smirked, it'd been a long time since I'd done actual math.

"You remembered." He beamed at me.

I nodded. "How could I forget?" I asked as butterflies filled my stomach when our eyes met.

I quickly darted my eyes away from him and back to in front of me, leaving him to awkwardly look away too and rub the back of his neck.

"So you're eighteen, eh?" He asked. "Time has gone by so fast." He sighed and ran a hand through his bangs (fringe, again), pushing them to the side, leaving the silver streak to hang in front of his eyes.

I felt my foot hit something, making me trip. "Shit!"

"Fuck! Clementine!" Luke said.

And as quickly as I had tripped, he caught me. Holding me close to his chest. God, did he smell amazing. His breathing was shaky as he slowly let go of me.

"Are you okay?" He panted, he actually looked stressed right now.

"Yeah, I- I think so." I reply, I'M shaken by how shaken HE seems. "Although, I think I just caused you to gain another silver streak in your hair." I frowned.

"It'd be fine by me, as long as you were safe." Luke sighed.

"COME ON, SLOW POKES!" I heard someone shout from in front of us. _This is NOT going to be another Lily situation, is it?_ I frowned.

"So, who's Ellie?" I ask while silently fighting a huge case of butterflies in my stomach.

"Huh? Oh, she's my sister." He smiled.

"Aw, how old is she?"

"Well, she's 29, but acts like a child, still." He says.

"And... Julie is...?"

"Her best friend, has been since they were kids back on the farm, Nick used ta help out and every now and then he'd bring over his sister... Julie, and eventually Ellie and Julie just became friends." Luke explains.

The whole time I'm fighting this weird feeling to gradually move closer to him. I don't even know why!

I feel the ground even out beneath us and think that we're at the end of the cliff, back in the field of snow I was viewing from before.

The snow crunches under my feet, it's coated in ice... ice is NOT my friend... I cringe at the sound of ice breaking, it's reminding me of seven years back, when the ice broke... when BONNIE broke it... and Luke got- I shiver remembering the horrific scene.

"You cold?" Luke questions. I didn't even notice he was looking my direction.

"No, just..." I trail off. I'm not sure if I should bring this up again. "When the ice broke seven years back, I still cringe at the sound of ice breaking." I sigh.

"Oh." Luke frowns. "Well, I'm safe... if that helps." Luke sighs.

"Yeah, but my mind doesn't seem to think so."

"LUKE! JULIE!" I hear a voice say and then... "Who's she?" who I guessed to be Ellie asked. "Looks like she's hitting it off with Luke." I hear her tease Julie. Julie scowls.

"Naw, just an old friend. This here, is Clementine." Luke smiles. "Clem, this is Ellie."

"Hi... Ellie." She really IS just like a child, not a defenseless one judging by the heavy stash of weapons I spot her having by just getting a frontal view of her, but still a child.

"Hi, so how did you meet Luke?"

"Uh, when I was eleven he rescued me from being eaten by a bunch of walkers, but before then-"

"You call 'em walkers too? Luke! You're not alone!" Ellie interrupts. I don't really mind though.

"I used ta call 'em Lurkers... then Clementine comes and calls 'em walkers and I picked it up." Luke explains to her.

"It's like picking accents of people up when they're from a different country, and you just so happen to BE in that country. England, for example." He shrugged.

"Anyways, up on that cliff, I almost totally died, but then your brother here, he came and saved my life." I smile.

Luke smiled sheepishly at me and rubbed the back of his neck. "Like he always does." I say. My thoughts are totally lost as I study his eyes.

They're more beautiful than I remember. They're that same chocolate brown, but they seem... I don't even know... better? If that's even possible.

I heard a soft chuckle that brought me back to reality come from Ellie's direction. Shit! I was staring.

**Luke's POV:**

Clementine was staring... and at me. Well she is kind of cute now-_ SHUT THE FUCK UP, MIND! You've screwed up enough by thinkin' someone was cute, for a lifetime of guilt!_ I reminded myself.

"So, is she joining our group?" Ellie asked.

It was silent. "Clem?" I asked.

"Uh... only if it's okay with you guys." Clementine replied.

Now that I'd found her I never wanted ta let go. But I wasn't so sure of what Clem would think of that. Also, I knew you couldn't own a person... not like that anyways.

"It'd be fine by me." I blurted out.

Ellie grinned at me before speaking "I'm okay with it. That just leaves you and Julie." Ellie said giving me a smirk.

"Julie...?" I asked.

"Yeah, right, whatever..." Julie said and rolled her eyes. I sent her a frown but soon returned my gaze back to Clementine and Ellie.

"Okay, sure... I guess, as long as it's okay with you guys." Clementine said cheerfully.

"Okay, awesome." I smiled.

"Come on, slow pokes. As my great uncle used to say, we're burnin' daylight." Julie said and faced away from me and towards the North, that's where we had originally been heading, North.

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><p><strong>AN: Again, another author's note. Can you tell I suck at endings? I mean look at how I ended this chapter... e.e anyways, I was just gonna say, THANK YOU! For all the support with this story, it really motivates me to actually WRITE the story. So thanks a lot! :)**


	3. Setting up Camp

**Clementine's POV:**

Julie obviously didn't like me. That wasn't even up for debate. I tried not to let it bother me, but that was like trying to let Nick shooting at me NOT bother me. It just wasn't possible. I wonder if Julie has the same trigger-finger problems.

I watch as Ellie walks and catches up to Julie. I lag behind with Luke.

"Well, it looks like Julie likes me." I say sarcastically. Luke chuckles, God, I missed that chuckle.

"She'll warm up ta ya, always does when it comes to new people." He smiled.

"Yeah..." I sigh and rub my arm nervously.

"You okay?" He asks me. "I didn't miss somethin' important, did I?" He asks again.

"Nah, things became important again as soon as you showed up and rescued me. Where might you've been where I wasn't, since then?" I questioned. No really, where could he have been for the past five minutes, when he'd been next to me the whole time?

"I dunno, lost in-" He silenced himself.

"Lost in... what?" I ask dubiously.

"Nothing, it- it's nothing." He sighs and turns his head to look at the ground.

"Okay..." I sigh. I wish Luke had Nick's eyes, I'd be able to tell exactly how Luke was feeling if he did.

"What're you thinking?" I frown, I know I shouldn't, but I really want to know.

"A lot of shit. Anythin' in particular that you're wonderin'?" He asked and turned his head to look at me.

I felt as my face became redder and redder at his question.

Luke smirks. "I think I know what you're thinking, and the answer is no. I was not thinking about you." This side of Luke seems different to me, it's like he's almost flirty, kind of.

I stay silent and hide my face under the visor of my hat. I don't really want to look at him, right now.

"Hey, no need to go red over it, kid." He frowns before I watch the visor of my hat get pushed up slightly, uncovering my eyes.

"You're gonna trip and fall on your own feet." He paused for a second. "And it's just me, you don't need to hide from ME of all people."

"So, do you play any instruments... or whatever?" I asked trying to change subject.

Luke chuckled. "Guitar, but what does it matter anymore? I've been able to since I was fourteen, but when was the last time you saw a guitar?" He asked. "Who carries a guitar around with them?"

"I knew a person once..." I mumble remembering Chuck.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"Yeah... and I got him killed, as usual." I sighed. Luke frowned.

"Don't think that, I'm sure it wasn't your fault." He said. I WANTED to believe that, but my brain just wouldn't let me.

"You should play sometime, guitar I mean."

"Yeah, well, all the guitars I see now a days, are either busted beyond no repair, or are out of tune so badly that I can't even begin to explain." He sighed again.

"She's right, you should play for us next time we find one." I jumped slightly as Ellie said this. She was like a ninja, one place one moment, a different the next. She reminded me of Molly, like Crawford, ''I'm a ninja!'' Molly.

Luke and Ellie chuckled. "Scardey cat much?" Luke asked.

"No, just... skittish." I said and stared back down at my combat boots.

"Guys..." Julie called out from the front of the group.

"Yeah?" All three of us asked.

"I think we should stop for the night."

"Okay." I replied, along with the rest of the group.

"Clementine, I don't suppose you brought a sleeping bag?" Julie said, man, she always sounded pissed off... or maybe it was just when she was talking to me... I don't know.

"No... I like to travel light." I explained. She scowled.

I think she had a plan for if I didn't, but it obviously was not 'Take mine' or 'We can share one'.

"Ellie? Would you mind sharing your sleeping bag with her?" Julie asked and pinched the bridge of her nose.

Ellie smirked. "I actually would mind; you see, I hurt my back." Ellie replied sneakily. I called her on her bluff in my mind, but chose not to say anything.

"Looks like you're bunking with Luke tonight. But nothing dirty, guys. We don't need a baby." Ellie smirked.

I felt my face burn red and looked towards Luke.

"Can I borrow your hat, Clem?" Luke asked. I took it off, handing it to him.

Luke put it on and pulled the visor down, covering his face. I chuckled slightly and pulled it off of him before putting it back on my head.

Luke dropped his backpack down before kneeling down next to it and opening it. Me, being the curious dumbie I am, looked into it as well and-

"Luke? Why do you have a jar of moonshine in your backpack?" I smirked. Luke's face flushed pinkish.

"You have alcohol?! And you didn't tell me?" Ellie frowned.

"I dunno, I like havin' a drink every now and again." Luke shrugged as he pulled out his sleeping bag.

"So guys, I was thinkin', tomorrow maybe I go on a supply run." Luke said as he rolled out his sleeping bag.

"I WANNA COME!" I said, the words were out of my mouth before I could stop them and, oh shit... Luke's raising an eyebrow at me now.

"I- I mean... only if you want me to come, with you." I said and scratched the back of my neck.

"Yeah, uh, okay." I heard Julie scoff in the background as Luke said this. "Always happy to have some help." He smiled and unzipped the sleeping bag. Afterwards he pulled out a pillow.

"So... Luke, do you know exactly where we are?" I asked.

"Uh, yeah, Maine." He answered.

I felt my jaw drop a little. I had walked from Georgia, to Maine!

"Why?"

"Just curious... that's all." I sighed.

I watched Julie climb into her sleeping bag, and then Ellie in hers, I climbed into Luke's and watched him, he was tensely squinting at the sleeping bag; he almost seemed unsure of something.

"Maybe I should take watch…" He said out loud. I frowned.

"Luke, when was the last time you actually saw a walker?" I asked.

Luke frowned. "But, what if they DO appear tonight?" He asked. Why was he acting so weird?

"Luke, there are a lot of what-if's. What if we're the last humans on earth? What if all the walkers have been exterminated? What if rocket crashes right where we're sleeping?" I said and propped myself up on my elbows.

"Yeah, but-"

"Get in here." I frowned.

Luke did so, he climbed in and zipped up the sleeping bag. I gave him a weird look, he was laying as far away from me as possible in the sleeping bag.

"Luke, you know you can actually sleep in the sleeping bag, and use the pillow, right?" I asked.

"Yeah, but…"

"If this makes you uncomfortable, I can get out and take first watch." I said. Even though it was dark I could still see his frown and hear his sigh as he ran a hand through his hair.

"It- it doesn't make me uncomfortable, it's just-" He did that thing where he silenced himself again.

"It's just…?" I questioned.

"Nothing. It's fine." He sighed and scooted closer from the edge.

I could feel one of the sides, of his hands lightly brushing against mine. His hands were rough, but in the best ways **I don't even know where I was going with this. **

I watched him shift uncomfortably and roll over on his side, facing away from me. I pouted even though I knew he couldn't see, before rolling on my own side, facing away from him. I waited a bit before pressing my back up against his and slightly tangling our legs. I swear, I felt his heartbeat quicken as I did this.

I waited again, this time, I waited until his breathing relaxed.

"Goodnight, Luke." I whispered, thinking he couldn't hear me.

"Goodnight, Clem." He whispered back.

I felt my face flush as I heard this, I could see the smirk on his face now, even if I wasn't looking directly at him, I could picture him smirking. _Ugh, _tomorrow was going to be one LONG day.


End file.
